Working with your lover will not come without its challenges. After doing this for over three years now I have a few tips for you.
Sure, it’s great when you can share everything with each other, but when your home life and work life is times two it can get a little stressful at times. The struggles will be different for every couple. Whether you start a business together or one hires the other, there are a few tips to make it easier for the long haul:
1. Make sure there is a Lead. This is not an ego thing it is a reality thing. Clients, distributors and potential business opportunities are going to benefit from knowing there is someone in charge. If one already owns the business, simply keep the role of the owner in charge the same for staff continuity. You do not want to look like nepotism and annoy current loyal staff by giving your lover all the benefits without working for it first. If opening together, perhaps make the decision about who has the final word based on percentage of ownership or expertise. If you cannot come up with one between the two of you, hire out. If you cannot afford to hire out because you are starting up; this may be a sign that there will be a struggle later and you may want to re-think partnering up with your lover. you also risk staff putting you against each other if you are “one” in the workplace.
2. Plan your schedule well and take separate days off. When you live and work together, you may feel like you never get “alone time”. Set your schedules so you have one day off together and one day off separate from one another. This gives you time alone at home as well as at work. Independence is important in both areas of your life. If you are going to open a business together, it will give you the opportunity to share duties at home as well since your life is so busy when starting a business. If one of you is being “inducted” to the other’s workspace, this is important for another reason. If you hire your lover, they may feel alienated at work if you are always there together. It will give the opportunity for bonding at work to happen and to establish work friendships that may not happen with both of you together. When planning the schedule, consider one taking Monday and one taking Tuesday off for long weekends. It is easier to have a colleague cover one of you than it is to find two. There will always be long weekends. This gives you the opportunity to take advantage of having something to look forward to. If you are doing business in Vancouver, you will be working hard and long hours, but you have access to so many beautiful places. See my blog on Whistler for one easy and inexpensive over night or day trip.
3. Do not try to make your lover do push ups if they love doing sit ups. Talk a lot with each other about your strengths and weaknesses as well as your passions. If you are starting a business together, think about delegating job duties/ description based on what drives you. If you are looking for help with your Social Media and your lover doesn’t even have an Instagram or know what Snap Chat is, maybe re-think hiring them as it may cause issues. Everybody has something to bring to the table. Make sure you both know what that is before working together.
4. Don’t NOT talk about work when you’re not at work. These “rules” can put a damper on things. Be open to talking about work. It’s what we spend so much of our time doing (working). Learn how to work together and you will enjoy work and enjoy talking about work even on your time off.
Working together can be a great experience. It takes much of the same practice it takes to keep a healthy relationship; Commitment and trust. Don’t get into business with or hire a lover that you do not trust one hundred percent or allow yourself to think this will make all your dreams instantly come true. Do it to have an experience together that will over time build just the same as your relationship does. Treat each other with respect and do your jobs. Be the best colleagues to each other you can be while growing together.
